Perjury

Two elderly friends, Dan and Ken, met in the park every day to feed the
pigeons, watch the squirrels and discuss world problems. One day Dan
didn't show up. Ken didn't think much about it and figured maybe he had
a cold or something. But after Dan hadn't shown up for a week or so, Ken
really got worried. However, since the only time they ever got together
was at the park, Ken didn't know where Dan lived, so he was unable to
find out what had happened to him.
A month had passed, and Ken figured he had seen the
last of Dan, but one day, Ken approached the park and -- lo and behold!
-- there sat Dan!
Ken was very excited and happy to see him and told him
so. Then he said, "For crying out loud Dan, what in the world happened
to you?"
Dan replied, "I have been in jail."
"Jail?" cried Ken. "What in the world for?"
"Well," Dan said, "you know Sue, that cute little
blonde waitress at the coffee shop where we sometimes go?"
"Yeah," said Ken, "I remember her. What about her?"
"Well, one day she filed rape charges against me and,
at 89 years old, I was so damn proud that when I got into court, I
pleaded guilty.
The judge gave me 30 days for perjury.