Quickies

crowgyrl · 07-03-2007, 11:34 PM

Quoting: Noodles

What did Julius Caesar say he found out he had herpes?

I came, I saw, I cankared.

EWWWW!!!

**Sp00k** · 07-04-2007, 08:14 AM

If they squeeze olives to get olive oil, then how do they get baby oil?

What's the difference between women and men?
One has morning sickness, the other has morning stiffnes

crowgyrl · 07-04-2007, 08:16 AM

Quoting: Sp00k

If they squeeze olives to get olive oil, then how do they get baby oil?

What's the difference between women and men?
One has morning sickness, the other has morning stiffnes

NightFaery · 07-04-2007, 08:23 AM

that is so funny both Spook and Noodles!!!

**Sp00k** · 07-05-2007, 06:53 AM

When Paris Hilton lefts jail, she went to see a speech therapist. Apparently, she
has difficulty in finishing a sentence.

What do you call a Scottish cloakroom attendant? - Angus McCoatup

What do you call 100 nuns in a shop? - Virgin Megastore

Does your wife miss you?
No, her aim is perfect.

I have changed my mind now.
Does the new one work any better?

**Sp00k** · 07-05-2007, 07:13 AM

Two nuns are driving down a road late at night when a vampire jumps onto the bonnet.

The nun who is driving says to the other, "Quick! Show him your cross."

So the other nun leans out of the window and shouts, "Get off our f*cking car."

**Noodles** · 07-05-2007, 11:57 AM

more great ones

**Sp00k** · 07-07-2007, 07:45 AM

Went to lunch with a friend today to a new chicken place.
We asked how they prepare their chickens.
The answer was, "We just tell them they're going to die."

NightFaery · 07-08-2007, 02:05 AM

sad mean

**Sp00k** · 07-08-2007, 08:09 AM

How to satisfy a man every time? - Show up naked.

Radar: "Flight 1234, for noise abatement turn right 45 degrees."

Pilot: "Roger, but we are at 35,000 feet, how much noise can we make up here?"

Radar: "Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 727 makes when it hits a 747?"

**Noodles** · 07-08-2007, 10:33 PM

**Sp00k** · 07-09-2007, 02:38 AM

How does a women hold her liquor?

By the ears.

Did you hear about the tramp who walked up to the Jewish mother on the street and said,
"Lady, - I haven't eaten in three days."
"Force yourself" she replied.

NightFaery · 07-09-2007, 08:08 PM

I love them keep um coming!!!