Funny Quotes

CrimsonNomad · 07-02-2007, 12:36 PM

Quoting: Sp00k

Ecstasy - A feeling you feel when you feel you are going to
feel a feeling you never felt before.

Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time.
I think I've forgotten this before.

Society is like a stew.
If you don't keep it stirred up, you get a lot of scum on top. - Edward Abbey

LOL... amnesia and deja vu...

**Sp00k** · 07-03-2007, 06:23 AM

Diarrhoea is hereditary, it runs in your jeans.

If the end does not justify the means - what can? - Edward Abbey

NightFaery · 07-03-2007, 06:08 PM

love it hun keep up the good work!!

**Sp00k** · 07-04-2007, 07:19 AM

One of the most wonderful things about life is that we must regularly
stop what we are doing and devote our attention to eating.-- Samuel Johnson

Shin - Device for finding furniture in the dark.

CrimsonNomad · 07-04-2007, 07:24 AM

So true...so true...

**Sp00k** · 07-04-2007, 07:29 AM

"Men of all shapes and sizes, ages and creeds, and states of marital or
relationship bliss enjoy, every now and then, the sight of a woman with no
clothes on. It's just as well we do, you know, otherwise there'd be no new
little earthlings, would there? If you want to call that oppression or
sexism or the commodification of the female body then go right ahead, but
don't expect me to talk to you at dinner parties. I prefer to call it sexual
attraction, but then I'm a sad fuck who spends half his life in front of
computer, so what the hell do I know?"
-- Michael Marshall Smith, "More Tomorrow"

* There was a man who said "I never knew what happiness was until I got married... and then it was too late!"

**Sp00k** · 07-07-2007, 06:42 AM

"I think my favourite word at the moment is 'sphincter'. People have been
using it a lot lately and it's starting to grow on me." -- Karen Peisley

Indecision may, or may not, be my problem" - Jimmy Buffett

NightFaery · 07-08-2007, 01:00 AM

:lmao

**Sp00k** · 07-08-2007, 07:19 AM

Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.

When I heated my home with oil, I used an average of 800 gallons a year. I have found that I can keep comfortably warm for an entire winter with slightly over half that quantity of beer. - Postpetroleum Guzzler, Dave Barry

"Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our children."
- J. Danforth Quayle, former U.S. Vice-President, September 18, 1990

**Noodles** · 07-08-2007, 09:30 PM

Quayle was such a putz.

Always love Dave Barry.

NightFaery · 07-09-2007, 04:31 PM

Very nice Sp00k!!!

**Sp00k** · 07-14-2007, 05:26 AM

"Trying" is the first step toward failure

- Homer Simpson

We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that
is in it - and stop there; lest we be like the cat that sits down on a
hot stove-lid. She will never sit down on a hot stove-lid again, and
that is well; but also she will never sit down on a cold one anymore.

-- Mark Twain

You can only be young once, but you can be immature forever.

"To what do you attribute your old age?"
"The fact that I was born a long time ago."

CrimsonNomad · 07-16-2007, 10:05 PM

Quoting: Sp00k

"To what do you attribute your old age?"
"The fact that I was born a long time ago."