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Teenage Tragedy
Old 01-06-2008, 04:11 PM   #1 (permalink)
Uriel

 
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Default Teenage Tragedy

trigger pulled
drink it down
you feel such pain
white light and sound
now they all just watch and see
this a teenage tragedy

release it all
a razors kiss
wonder now
will i be missed
now they all just watch and see
this a teenage tragedy

a fathers foot
a mothers hand
2 deaths and jail
from angered stand
now they all just watch and see
this a teenage tragedy


(Ive already heard a lot about this one. Before you remark this is not meant to disturb or frighten, it is simply poetry.)
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Re: Teenage Tragedy
Old 01-06-2008, 04:19 PM   #2 (permalink)
G_Man



 
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Default Re: Teenage Tragedy

So, where did this come from? Pretty strong stuff....
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Re: Teenage Tragedy
Old 01-06-2008, 04:23 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Teenage Tragedy

I just sat here and thought
I felt poetic so I let my mind wander and my fingers just go
I find that the stuff thats "disturbing" gets a better response if that makes any sense
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Re: Teenage Tragedy
Old 01-06-2008, 04:34 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Teenage Tragedy

Shock has its value. I would like to read some of your less shocking stuff, too, though.
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Re: Teenage Tragedy
Old 01-06-2008, 04:40 PM   #5 (permalink)
Uriel

 
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Default Re: Teenage Tragedy

For sure
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Re: Teenage Tragedy
Old 01-07-2008, 12:06 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: Teenage Tragedy

I found it interesting, but not really disturbing. Lots of emotion from so few words is not easy.


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Re: Teenage Tragedy
Old 01-07-2008, 11:17 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: Teenage Tragedy

Suicidal poetry? It is indeed powerful verse.




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Last edited by Sp00k : 01-07-2008 at 11:19 AM.
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Re: Teenage Tragedy
Old 01-07-2008, 01:28 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: Teenage Tragedy

Not necessarily disturbing....I like it.
"A fool always finds a greater fool to admire him" Alexander Pope
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Re: Teenage Tragedy
Old 01-07-2008, 07:37 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Default Re: Teenage Tragedy

thank you
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Re: Teenage Tragedy
Old 01-08-2008, 06:56 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Default Re: Teenage Tragedy

When I was in high school I wrote quite a bit and most of my writings could be mistaken as disturbing. It's an outlet....doesn't necessarily mean you want to kill yourself or anyone else. I was always encouraged by my creative writing teacher...it can be a very healthy outlet.
"A fool always finds a greater fool to admire him" Alexander Pope
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